Kathy Perry Britton, CEO of Perry Homes, a titan of business and devotee of Zig “See You at the Top” Ziglar, has reportedly given up on her dream of building swamp homes in Woodridge Village. She has new ideas to turn mud into money.
Her confidante and hairdresser hints Britton has toyed with several options. The leading one at the moment: Turning the land into a world-class scuba center called “That Sinking Feeling.” She plans to market it to people who are underwater on their homes.
If You Can’t Beat ‘Em, Boil ‘Em
“Perry Homes stands for quality,” she supposedly said. “And always will. If the scuba center doesn’t work, there’s no shortage of mud bugs out there. We’ll turn this into the Crawfish Capital of the Gulf Coast.” And then in a comment that reportedly angered crustacean-rights activists, she added, “If you can’t beat ’em, boil ’em!”
The irrepressible, unstoppable Britton reportedly has other backup options, too. “If that doesn’t work, Vince McMahon has approached us about turning this into the WWE Female Mud Wrestling Capital of the World,” Britton’s chambermaid reported. “He has plenty of stars lined up to turn this into a fairy-tale success. Vince has already received letters of intent from Misty Raine, Muddie Waters, and Hurrie Spitball Caine.”
Ms. Britton, paraphrasing Mark Twain, reportedly told her bootlicker, “The rumors of our bankruptcy have been greatly exaggerated. We have plenty of options to make a buck out there if suing the flood victims doesn’t work.”
According to unnamed insiders, Christian Louboutin has also supposedly brainstormed with Britton about brand extensions. Britton is confident there’s a market for stiletto hip-waders in Houston. “It’s a natural in places like Elm Grove. How else would women get to their cars in the rain?”
MoCo Offers Tax Incentives
The rumor mill also says that Wham-O has approached Perry Homes about turning Woodridge Village into the world’s largest Slip ‘N Slide. The irrepressible Britton told her fingernail artist, “Montgomery County even offered us tax breaks, finder’s fees, and margaritas. They’re so accommodating up there.”
In a rare moment of candor, Britton reportedly complained to her lawyer extraordinaire, J. Carey “Promise Them Anything” Gray. “I’m tired of all the mud slinging by these so-called flood victims in Elm Grove. It’s their fault they flooded. They built downstream from us. Duh! What were they thinking?”
“If worse comes to bratwurst,” Britton supposedly bragged to her chauffeur, “Home Depot and Lowes have both expressed interest in building mega repair centers on the property. They have raved to us about the possibilities. Repeat flooding. Hundreds of homes each time. Think about the potential synergies. My God, we could go public on the rumors alone and make a killing.”
The Right to Make a Profit
“I don’t know what these Elm Grove people are complaining about,” Britton reportedly grumbled to her masseuse. “I have to fly to Paris for a good mud bath. They get it for free.”
“These Elm Grove people are so hurtful. Always slinging mud. I have feelings, too. I just wish they could be positive for a change and see the marketing potential in all of this. We have a right to make a profit. This IS Texas after all.”
With that, Britton reportedly hurried off to discuss a separate deal with Monster MudTruck Rodeo organizers.
In Loving Memory of Robin Leach, A Parody Roast Post by Bob Rehak on 1/28/2020
882 Days since Hurricane Harvey and 131 since Imelda
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance between characters in this post and executives of Perry Homes is strictly coincidental.
The thoughts expressed in this post represent opinions on matters of public concern and safety. They are protected by the First Amendment of the US Constitution and the Anti-SLAPP Statute of the Great State of Texas.
https://i0.wp.com/reduceflooding.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Woodridge-After-1-Inch.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=16751200adminadmin2020-01-28 07:29:342020-01-28 07:34:55Perry Homes Converting Woodridge Village to Scuba Center or Maybe a…
Erosion exposed five pipelines carrying highly volatile liquids through the Liberty Materials mine in Conroe. Photo from December 3, 2019.
Repairs Now Underway
Several local engineers who saw the problem leaped into action and immediately reported the issue to the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality and the Texas Railroad Commission. Four of the five pipelines were interstate and therefore regulated by the Pipeline and Hazardous Materials Safety Administration. TRRC forwarded the complaints to them.
When I flew over the same mine on January 20, 2020, workers were busy shoring up the pipelines to protect the public.
Pictures from January 20, 2020, Flyover
From the materials stockpiled on the site, it appears that large drain pipes under the HVL pipelines will be part of the fix. These drain pipes appear to be as tall as the pickup truck parked next to them.
Looking south, you can see drain pipes and riprap stockpiled on the left. Looking south again. Workers appear to be creating an even deeper trench under the pipelines and pumping out groundwater.Reverse angle, looking north. Water drains down from the northern portion on the mine through wetlands, under the pipelines, and then into the main southern part of the mine.From there, it makes its way to the San Jacinto River, out of frame behind the camera position.Looking southwest. You can see wetlands draining from the northern portion of the site to the problem area in the upper left.Looking north, you can see the scale of the drain pipes relative to the vehicles parked next to them.The pipelines look less bowed than in the first shot from last December. However, there is still a pronounced dip between the left and right sides of at least two pipelines in the photo.
Situation at Triple PG Mine in Porter
These same pipelines run through the Triple PG mine in Porter to the southwest. See the utility corridor under the electric lines in the photo below. I reported on them in December also. The pipelines have not yet been exposed at this point, but no effort has been made to stop the erosion before it creates another safety issue.
Looking NW. The same pipelines cut through the Triple PG mine in Porter. Erosion from Harvey and Imelda has eaten away the ground on either side of the pipelines. They could be exposed in the next large storm.Photo taken 1/20/2020.
During Harvey and Imelda, Caney Creek rerouted itself through this mine in a process called pit or river capture. Floodwater eroded a new path from the top of the photo above to the bottom. The pipelines have not yet been exposed, but easily could be by the next large storm. The inverted v-shaped cut you see in the photo above grew by almost 1000 feet since 2017.
This reverse angle shot shows the proximity of erosion from the north to the utility corridor with the 5 HVL pipelines. The pond at the right now actually touches the utility easement.This satellite image in Google Earth also shows erosion at the edge the utility/pipeline corridor.The streaks of sand across the corridor show the direction of water flow during Imelda.
Because of the Triple PG Mine’s proximity to the source of drinking water for 2 million people, this erosion probably represents an even greater threat than erosion at the Liberty Mine in Conroe. Caney Creek flows through this mine during floods. And Caney Creek empties directly into the East Fork and Lake Houston.
This pipeline used to carry natural gas for Kinder Morgan. Triple PG mined too close to it also. Then erosion during Harvey and Imelda exposed it – twice. KM abandoned this line and filled it with inert gas. They then drilled a new line 75 feet under the mine.But this exposed pipeline stands as a mute reminder to the safety hazard.
It all comes down to sand vs. safety. It’s their sand. Your safety.
Posted by Bob Rehak on 1/27/2020
881 Days since Hurricane Harvey and 130 since Imelda
The thoughts expressed in this post represent opinions on matters of public concern and safety. They are protected by the First Amendment of the US Constitution and the Anti-SLAPP Statute of the Great State of Texas.
https://i0.wp.com/reduceflooding.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/20200120-RJR_6558.jpg?fit=1200%2C800&ssl=18001200adminadmin2020-01-27 16:06:302020-01-27 17:00:23Pipeline Bed Repairs Now Underway at Liberty Mine; At Triple PG Mine, No Progress
Earlier this month, the State, Harris County and City of Houston announced the next phase of West Fork mouth bar dredging. Late last week, it got underway in earnest.
West Fork mouth bar on Monday 1.20.2020 before mechanical dredging started.
How Mechanical Dredging Works
Rachel Taylor took the ground-level pictures below earlier today from her back yard in Atascocita Point. They show mechanical excavators eating away at the mouth bar and loading the spoils on barges.
Sunday afternoon, 1.26.2020, two mechanical excavators worked the western end of the mouth bar. They loaded the spoils on waiting barges (right). Photo courtesy of Rachel Lavin Taylor.Service boats then pushed the barges upriver. Photo courtesy of Rachel Lavin Taylor. Barge loaded with spoils passes the Deerwood Country Club. Photo courtesy of Rachel Lavin Taylor.Barges then anchor at Berry Madden’s property on the south side of the West Fork opposite River Grove Park.That black object jutting into the photo from the lower left is the skid of the helicopter.Photo taken 1.20.2020.From there, other trucks move the spoils inland.For orientation, that water tower in the upper left is south of Kings Lake Estates.Photo taken 1.20.2020.
Mechanical dredging is slower and more labor intensive than hydraulic dredging, but can mobilize faster. In hydraulic dredging, dredgers pump the spoils to a placement area via pipelines. That is faster, but has higher overhead. It also creates more noise.
Hydraulic Dredging Options
The hydraulic pipelines can stretch miles. In the case of the first phase of West Fork mouth bar dredging, they stretched 10 miles upstream. It took five booster pumps to get the material all that way to a sand mine on Sorters just south of Kingwood Drive.
Luckily for us, the pipe from the first phase of mouth bar dredging is still at the Army Corps dock opposite Forest Cove.
Pipe from the first phase of mouth bar dredging still sits at the former Army Corps command post and could be rewelded into longer sections if needed.The Great Lakes Dredge also remains at the dock. Here you see the pieces below and behind the crane.
At some point in this project, dredging may switch from mechanical to hydraulic. The fact that the Great Lakes dredge remained here bodes well. It chewed through 500,000 cubic yards of debris at the West Fork mouth bar in less than three months. Officials expect mechanical dredging of 400,000 cubic yards to take 8 -12 months.
Additional Dredging Targets and Financing
Other targets reportedly include the East Fork Mouth Bar and several mouth bars that have formed at the mouths of ditches or streams leading into the lake.
State Representative Dan Huberty helped bring $30 million to this phase of dredging via an amendment to SB500 in the last legislature. That money will funnel through Harris County via the Texas Water Development Board. The County also included $10 million in the 2018 flood bond. And the City is applying $6 million left over from a FEMA/TDEM grant for debris removal from Harvey.
Phase One will focus on the West Fork Mouth Bar using the City’s $6 million and $10 million from the TWDB grant.
Phase Two will focus on the East Fork Mouth Bar using the remaining $20 million from the grant.
The $10 million from the County flood bond will fund surveys, formulation of specs, bidding, project management and more.
Progress Result of Pulling Together
All this is great news for the Lake Houston Area. The entire community worked since Harvey to make this happen through all levels of government.
As we look at other flooding problems in the area, it’s important not to get discouraged and to remember that we can make progress if we all pull together.
Posted by Bob Rehak on 1/26/2020 with photos from Rachel Lavin Taylor
880 Days since Hurricane Harvey
https://i0.wp.com/reduceflooding.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/01.26-7-Taylor.jpg?fit=1200%2C599&ssl=15991200adminadmin2020-01-26 18:35:112020-01-26 19:05:22Mouth Bar Dredging: First Pictures of Next Phase
Perry Homes Converting Woodridge Village to Scuba Center or Maybe a…
From Lifestyles of the Rich and Infamous
Kathy Perry Britton, CEO of Perry Homes, a titan of business and devotee of Zig “See You at the Top” Ziglar, has reportedly given up on her dream of building swamp homes in Woodridge Village. She has new ideas to turn mud into money.
Her confidante and hairdresser hints Britton has toyed with several options. The leading one at the moment: Turning the land into a world-class scuba center called “That Sinking Feeling.” She plans to market it to people who are underwater on their homes.
If You Can’t Beat ‘Em, Boil ‘Em
“Perry Homes stands for quality,” she supposedly said. “And always will. If the scuba center doesn’t work, there’s no shortage of mud bugs out there. We’ll turn this into the Crawfish Capital of the Gulf Coast.” And then in a comment that reportedly angered crustacean-rights activists, she added, “If you can’t beat ’em, boil ’em!”
The irrepressible, unstoppable Britton reportedly has other backup options, too. “If that doesn’t work, Vince McMahon has approached us about turning this into the WWE Female Mud Wrestling Capital of the World,” Britton’s chambermaid reported. “He has plenty of stars lined up to turn this into a fairy-tale success. Vince has already received letters of intent from Misty Raine, Muddie Waters, and Hurrie Spitball Caine.”
Ms. Britton, paraphrasing Mark Twain, reportedly told her bootlicker, “The rumors of our bankruptcy have been greatly exaggerated. We have plenty of options to make a buck out there if suing the flood victims doesn’t work.”
According to unnamed insiders, Christian Louboutin has also supposedly brainstormed with Britton about brand extensions. Britton is confident there’s a market for stiletto hip-waders in Houston. “It’s a natural in places like Elm Grove. How else would women get to their cars in the rain?”
MoCo Offers Tax Incentives
The rumor mill also says that Wham-O has approached Perry Homes about turning Woodridge Village into the world’s largest Slip ‘N Slide. The irrepressible Britton told her fingernail artist, “Montgomery County even offered us tax breaks, finder’s fees, and margaritas. They’re so accommodating up there.”
In a rare moment of candor, Britton reportedly complained to her lawyer extraordinaire, J. Carey “Promise Them Anything” Gray. “I’m tired of all the mud slinging by these so-called flood victims in Elm Grove. It’s their fault they flooded. They built downstream from us. Duh! What were they thinking?”
“If worse comes to bratwurst,” Britton supposedly bragged to her chauffeur, “Home Depot and Lowes have both expressed interest in building mega repair centers on the property. They have raved to us about the possibilities. Repeat flooding. Hundreds of homes each time. Think about the potential synergies. My God, we could go public on the rumors alone and make a killing.”
The Right to Make a Profit
“I don’t know what these Elm Grove people are complaining about,” Britton reportedly grumbled to her masseuse. “I have to fly to Paris for a good mud bath. They get it for free.”
“These Elm Grove people are so hurtful. Always slinging mud. I have feelings, too. I just wish they could be positive for a change and see the marketing potential in all of this. We have a right to make a profit. This IS Texas after all.”
With that, Britton reportedly hurried off to discuss a separate deal with Monster MudTruck Rodeo organizers.
In Loving Memory of Robin Leach, A Parody Roast Post by Bob Rehak on 1/28/2020
882 Days since Hurricane Harvey and 131 since Imelda
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance between characters in this post and executives of Perry Homes is strictly coincidental.
The thoughts expressed in this post represent opinions on matters of public concern and safety. They are protected by the First Amendment of the US Constitution and the Anti-SLAPP Statute of the Great State of Texas.
Pipeline Bed Repairs Now Underway at Liberty Mine; At Triple PG Mine, No Progress
In December, I reported on how sand mining on both sides of pipelines contributed to erosion underneath them. Such erosion exposed five pipelines carrying highly volatile liquids (HVL) through one of the Liberty Materials mines in Conroe. The pipelines sagged across the gap like clotheslines. See below.
Repairs Now Underway
Several local engineers who saw the problem leaped into action and immediately reported the issue to the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality and the Texas Railroad Commission. Four of the five pipelines were interstate and therefore regulated by the Pipeline and Hazardous Materials Safety Administration. TRRC forwarded the complaints to them.
When I flew over the same mine on January 20, 2020, workers were busy shoring up the pipelines to protect the public.
Pictures from January 20, 2020, Flyover
From the materials stockpiled on the site, it appears that large drain pipes under the HVL pipelines will be part of the fix. These drain pipes appear to be as tall as the pickup truck parked next to them.
Situation at Triple PG Mine in Porter
These same pipelines run through the Triple PG mine in Porter to the southwest. See the utility corridor under the electric lines in the photo below. I reported on them in December also. The pipelines have not yet been exposed at this point, but no effort has been made to stop the erosion before it creates another safety issue.
During Harvey and Imelda, Caney Creek rerouted itself through this mine in a process called pit or river capture. Floodwater eroded a new path from the top of the photo above to the bottom. The pipelines have not yet been exposed, but easily could be by the next large storm. The inverted v-shaped cut you see in the photo above grew by almost 1000 feet since 2017.
Because of the Triple PG Mine’s proximity to the source of drinking water for 2 million people, this erosion probably represents an even greater threat than erosion at the Liberty Mine in Conroe. Caney Creek flows through this mine during floods. And Caney Creek empties directly into the East Fork and Lake Houston.
Posted by Bob Rehak on 1/27/2020
881 Days since Hurricane Harvey and 130 since Imelda
The thoughts expressed in this post represent opinions on matters of public concern and safety. They are protected by the First Amendment of the US Constitution and the Anti-SLAPP Statute of the Great State of Texas.
Mouth Bar Dredging: First Pictures of Next Phase
Earlier this month, the State, Harris County and City of Houston announced the next phase of West Fork mouth bar dredging. Late last week, it got underway in earnest.
How Mechanical Dredging Works
Rachel Taylor took the ground-level pictures below earlier today from her back yard in Atascocita Point. They show mechanical excavators eating away at the mouth bar and loading the spoils on barges.
Hydraulic Dredging Options
The hydraulic pipelines can stretch miles. In the case of the first phase of West Fork mouth bar dredging, they stretched 10 miles upstream. It took five booster pumps to get the material all that way to a sand mine on Sorters just south of Kingwood Drive.
Luckily for us, the pipe from the first phase of mouth bar dredging is still at the Army Corps dock opposite Forest Cove.
At some point in this project, dredging may switch from mechanical to hydraulic. The fact that the Great Lakes dredge remained here bodes well. It chewed through 500,000 cubic yards of debris at the West Fork mouth bar in less than three months. Officials expect mechanical dredging of 400,000 cubic yards to take 8 -12 months.
Additional Dredging Targets and Financing
Other targets reportedly include the East Fork Mouth Bar and several mouth bars that have formed at the mouths of ditches or streams leading into the lake.
State Representative Dan Huberty helped bring $30 million to this phase of dredging via an amendment to SB500 in the last legislature. That money will funnel through Harris County via the Texas Water Development Board. The County also included $10 million in the 2018 flood bond. And the City is applying $6 million left over from a FEMA/TDEM grant for debris removal from Harvey.
For more details on this next phase of dredging, see the previous post on this project.
Two Phase Project Outlined In Grant
Harris County’s proposal for the grant from the Texas Water Development Board (TWDB) calls for splitting the project into two phases.
Progress Result of Pulling Together
All this is great news for the Lake Houston Area. The entire community worked since Harvey to make this happen through all levels of government.
As we look at other flooding problems in the area, it’s important not to get discouraged and to remember that we can make progress if we all pull together.
Posted by Bob Rehak on 1/26/2020 with photos from Rachel Lavin Taylor
880 Days since Hurricane Harvey