My weird nephew Izzy wants to rent one of those new 660-square-foot homelets going up in the Preserve at Woodridge. He came to me so excited the other day that he was gesturing wildly and sloshed beer all over his Mötley Crüe T-shirt.
“Uncle Bob,” he enthused, “You gotta see these places! I can maybe actually possibly afford one!”
That’s saying a lot. Or a little. Izzy isn’t exactly the top earner down at the Crystal Pistol. The owner demoted him from bartender to sweeping up beer nuts and cigarette butts. That happened after the owner learned Izzy had applied to be the head of the Flood Control District. Something about not showing loyalty and appreciation.
“A lease is a pretty big obligation, Izzy,” I said.
“It’s better than living outa the back seat of my Oldsmobile,” Izzy shot back.
“I thought you told me it would be a collector’s item someday.”
All the Amenities
“True,” said Izzy, “but these homelets, they got flush toilets.”
“I can see the advantage there. But they’re so close together, Izzy.”
“That’s one of the big pluses, Uncle Bob.”
“Why is that?”
“No trees to water. No grass to mow. More time for the ladies.”
“But Izzy. People commute all the way to Kingwood because they like nature.”
“Well, I heard they give you a geranium.”
“Will it fit?”
“Them homelets, they got plenty of room. Some even gots a study.”
“Do you own a book, Izzy?”
“No, but I got me a library card.”
“Have you ever used it?”
“I see your point, Uncle Bob. “
“Izzy, what you really need is a washer and drier.”
“When do you move in?”
Posted by Bob Rehak on 9/3/2022
1831 Days since Hurricane Harvey
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